A perverse person stirs up
conflict, and a gossip separates close friends. Proverbs 16:28
Neither
Lois nor Lance would look at each other, or their lawyers. Fifteen years of
marriage was ending in a cold courtroom with even colder hearts. Nothing was
left of the passion, trust, and hopefulness they once shared. There had been no
infidelity, no bankruptcy, and no abuse. However, intimacy had been sucked out
of their marriage by an enormous vacuum cleaner called gossip. Lois wouldn’t
stop confiding intimate secrets to her family and her girlfriends. To
retaliate, Lance had divulged her secrets to the guys in the shop. It had been
small indiscretions at first. But even after each had pleaded for privacy, set
boundaries, and threatened divorce, neither seemed willing to control their
tongues. Little by little, gossip created a crevice in their marriage that,
over time, had become the Grand Canyon.
Healthy
relationships are built upon the twin pillars of trust and respect. Without
those in place, neither a friendship nor a marriage can thrive. Intimate
friendship is a treasured gift, rare in its occurrence and priceless in its
value. When we have been handed such a gift, we should hold it in reverent
hands. Proverbs warns us that the very act of confiding someone’s secrets to
outsiders is the path toward separation from that person. Gossip is not the
seeking of wise counsel with someone who can be part of a solution. Gossip is
the selfishly-motivated divulging of something that is not ours to share. The
hearts—and the secrets—of the ones who trust us should be safe in our hands and
far from the gossip fire.
