Are You Hiding?

"I'm not ready."

"Yes, you are."

No...but..."

"You'll never know enough. You can't help anybody, but I can and I need you to stop hiding and get out there."

Such was the conversation the Lord and I had Sunday evening.

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I've spent an intense 4 1/2 months training for my lay-counseling certification and have learned more than I imagined I could. Of course there are places you can find which offer you a "paper" for a simple how-to course, but I wanted much more than that and the Lord directed me to the perfect school for me. It's deep, it's intense, it's full of incredible spiritual revelations, and when I realized I could continue on in the Master's degree classes for free, I decided to do that too. After all, you can't learn too much. Right? These are people's LIVES I'm dealing with. Can't be overly prepared. Right?

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All well and good, but the problem was, I was putting off gaining the actual paper--which I could do at any time--and get going with the ministry. I hadn't realized that's what I was doing, but the Lord made it pretty clear. "You are hiding. You are waiting until YOU feel secure and I don't want you like that. I need your weakness, not your strength."

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I stopped my prayer, went downstairs, and ordered the one certification class that was lacking. The next day, my pastor called.

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"Got someone I need you to talk to."

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"But...I'm not ready..."

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"You can do it."

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I could feel the Lord nudging me from behind. Probably smiling.

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How many other times have I hidden myself, just as Adam and Eve did in the garden? We hide behind our weaknesses, our frailties, our insecurities, arguing with the Lord, certain he can't mean what we think he means.

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"I'm not good enough..."

"I'm not smart enough..."

"That's for other people who can do better than I..."

All through history, God has called the least likely individuals to do the greatest work for him. Gideon and his measly army; Rahab, the town whore; that crazy, unkempt wild man they called John the Baptist. God delights in taking our inability and doing great things with it.

It's our abilities that get us in trouble with Pride.

The counseling session went just as the Holy Spirit wanted it to go, because I had to rely completely on him. I think that's what the Lord had in mind all along.

So what are you hiding from? What gentle nudging do you feel in the back of your spirit? The one you've successfully tramped down until now, covered with your reasonable excuses, and tried to ignore because you're just "not ready."

If you don't feel ready, you're probably right where God wants you. Come out, come out, wherever you are. Stop hiding. You're missing the game.